Writers Wednedsay 6/28/06

Here is an excerpt from the book I'm currently working on. I decided to scrap this scene and rewrite it....so this portion will not be in the book. But you get a feel for what I've been working on lately.


“Want some coke?” Mark offered a share of his drugs. “It’s a good distraction. You can get that pop princess out of your head.” Mark tried to convince him as a scantily clad brunette wandered over to Michael. She cooed in his ear how she was a fan and wanted to buy him a drink. What the hell he thought and agreed. She made herself comfortable in his arm. He shook his head at Mark, letting him know he didn’t want to get high, and raised his eyebrows as he motioned toward the chick in his arm. Mark tipped his beer up in response, narrowly spilling it and proceeding to laugh hysterically.
“Hey Michael, this is Bambi. She wanted to say hi, if you know what I mean.” Grayson strolled over with a blonde on his right arm and a brunette on his other arm. Bambi sauntered into Michael’s arm, batting her eyelashes, flipping her blonde hair back, and bouncing her boobs in her low-cut shirt.
Michael took another swig of his beer and chastised himself for thinking of her again. He made sure to pay better attention to the chicks at hand. He was really hoping to go home with one to keep his mind distracted.
Just as he was about to offer his services for the night to Bambi, a movement ahead caught his attention. He turned his head to look and saw the unmistakable red hair flowing. Becca was here? When the hell did she show up? She was walking briskly to the door. Michael stepped forward, calling out her name. The groupies were still attached to him arms, so he didn’t get very far. He didn’t think she saw him, but she sure seemed to be in a hurry to get out of there.
His heart beat rapidly. He hadn’t expected to see her until the recording on Monday. He didn’t think her “man” was into night clubs, and never expected her to show up at the Factory.
“Wasn’t that Becky?” Grayson stood next to Michael, his eyes glazed over from weed, the chick on his arm kissing his dimpled cheek.
“Yeah, that was.” Michael’s voice was lost among the music and noise, the girls pulled him back to the bar and bought him another drink.
“Forget her Mike. She ain’t worth it. Here, have some on me.” Mark slurred his words as he slipped some coke in Michael’s hand.
“Man, no thanks. You know I don’t do that stuff anymore.” Michael was getting tired of telling Mark no frequently. He was always pushing stuff onto him, and frankly, Michael was getting worried, as Mark was starting to go overboard with it.
“Tiff and I are leaving, heading back to my place.” Grayson announced, raising his eyebrows, a sly smile on his face. Normally that was Michael’s cue to leave with a chick on his arm too. But tonight he just couldn’t; he just was to preoccupied and didn’t feel right about bagging a chick when all he could think about was Becca. Why did she run out of there like that? What was he doing by not talking to her anymore? He was more confused than ever, and sex was not going to make things better for him, as difficult a concept that was for him to manage.
“I’m going to get going too.” Michael pushed the ladies off his arms gently, letting them know he was going to go home alone tonight. He noticed the way Grayson and Mark looked at each other, the worried looks on their faces, but he didn’t care. His heart just wasn’t into it tonight.
“You ok Michael?” Grayson put his hand on his shoulder, his eyes genuinely concerned. Michael’s answer to that of course was no, he wasn’t ok. He didn’t want to be stuck at some night club, looking for meaningless sex and drugs. He wanted to be with Becca. It wasn’t supposed to go down like this. This was not the way he had imagined the time Becca was here to be. But it was too late to do anything now.
“Yeah man, I’m fine. I got a long week coming up.” He lowered his eyes. Michael felt bad; he rarely turned down the groupies, but he just didn’t want to explain his situation to the guys and didn’t want the girls to think he was not as cool as he used to be. At this point he was ready to say just about anything to get out of there. He felt so out of control, and he hated that. He was looking forward to the end of the week when everything would be back to normal. Becca would be out of his life again, and he would be back to his usual lifestyle. He just wasn’t sure that was exactly what was best, or what he wanted. His heart ached as he realized it would never be over; he would never be over her, no matter what he did. His only hope was to ignore the flutter in his heart, the nagging in his mind. He just hoped he could live like that for the rest of his life.

Opinions!!

Alright...I know many people READ my blog...but not many seem to REPLY. Here's a chance to make your voice (or type) heard (or read)!

I will continue to do Writer's Wed (I know I slacked off last week...with the whole pg news I just was too excited to think of anything else)...but I would like opinions on what you would like to read.

Would you like more poetry? A short story? More Dynasty 2? Another excerpt from my current book? An excerpt from a previous novel? A character profile? Any requests?

Let me know what YOU would like to read!

New blog!

I have a new blog! It's all about my pregnancy and miracle baby! I don't want this blog to be nothing but pg....so I made a whole new blog. Check it out!! Come share in my joy with me.

slacking

I know I know! I've been slacking on the blog again! There hasn't been much to update on unless you care to hear all about the symptoms of my pg. (do you really want to hear about the fatigue and frequent urination?)

Not much has been going on. It's actually been a quiet week around here. Other than telling various people, no real excitement.
I babysat my neighbor's kids on Monday afternoon. I got a taste of what it will be like with 2 kids. Not bad. For the one day anyway. haha

This weekend is Father's Day. I will be telling the rest of my family. I'm looking forward to that!

Hope to find something exciting to update you all on soon. I feel like a pretty boring person right now! haha

PIctures

Here is the picture of the cake and strawberries for dh. For some reason blogger wouldn't let me put it on the last post.



Here is Ryan in his I'm the Big Brother t-shirt. He looks so proud!!

How I told....

Here is how I told dh. The last two pregnancies I was so excited over it that I just rushed into telling him. (With Ryan I POAS during breakfast and was so excited I ran out to tell him and showed him the stick over eggs, with the m/c the line was so faint I couldn't tell if it was a BFP or not so I showed him). So this time I wanted to do something different.

I'm due on Valentines day (how AMAZING is that?!!) so I thought I'd get a cake with red flowers on it and write on it Miracle Baby due 2-14-07. Then I got some strawberries (I craved strawberries like you wouldn't believe when I was pg with Ryan) in a bowl. I was originally going to do this all Wed night when I found out....but it would figure his work would not cooperate with me. It was the ONE night he had to work at night!!! He didn't get home until 2am. So I did it in the morning...cake for breakfast!! LOL
I put the cake and the strawberries on the table and he came in the room and smiled. I tried to get Ryan to say "I'm going to be a big brother" but the silly 3.5 yr old that he is refused to say it. (I don't want to say that mommy). So I ended up saying it and dh was laughing. He didn't have teh emotional response I was hoping for, but I know he's happy.
He's probably happy mainly because we don't need to time sex anymore!!! hahaha

I told my parents on Friday. I got a t-shirt for Ryan that says "I'm the Big Brother" and had him wear it to their house on Friday. My mom was the first to see him. She didn't get the concept at first....wondered who gave him the shirt and why he was wearing a t-shirt on a cold day. She kept saying it over and over until finally it clicked! She looked at me with wide eyes "YOU'RE PREGNANT?!" When I nodded she didn't believe me! (of course, I wouldn't have believed it either...after 2 yrs you tend to doubt). It was priceless and I wish I had the video camera.

My dad was at work at the time, so we went to go see him. It took him even longer to figure out the shirt. We practically had to spell it out to him. LOL But once he got it he started crying! I started crying then!! LOL He couldn't stop staying how happy he was! (he's been asking for another grandchild for a while now). It was just so special.

I still have so many more people to tell. I will tell the rest of my family on Father's Day. Then there's the people at church tomorrow and other various friends. The more people I tell the more real it feels. This really is happening!!

Finally....a BFP!!!!

I can't believe it!!!!!!!!!!! After 26 loooong months.....just over 2 years of ttc/infertility.....I finally got a BFP!!!!!!!!! I'm in complete and utter shock!

I have been feeling symptoms since 6 DPO....sore boobs, af like cramps, fatigue. I even had an aversion to veggie dip for a day. I KNEW something was up, but I took a test on 9 DPO and it was neg. Figured I was imagining the symptoms. I had been spotting for about 5 days, so I figured af was on her way. On 11 DPO my temp went up....which it NEVER does that far into my lp (I normally don't even have an lp that long) so I tested using Dollar Tree. Got a faint line. Tried FRER and got a definite BFP!!!! Woo hooo!!!! I called my OB and she had me come in for a blood test...my hcg level on 11 DPO was 30!!! Very good so far!!! And just to be sure I'm not day dreaming...I took another Dollar Tree test today (14 DPO) and got a VERY definite BFP!!!!! I'm still in such shock!!! I never thought it would happen. I was just getting used to the idea of Ryan being the only child. Miracles really do happen.

I think God was just waiting for me to give it all up to Him. After clomid failed, I couldn't deal with it anymore. I gave up my journey to Him. I started to trust in Him fully and learn to live and be happy with my situation. I think God said "FINALLY!". Amazing things do happen when you believe!!! :D

I'm feeling good right now. Tired. I get worn out pretty quickly. I still have af like cramps...they come and go. They get worse when I'm active. Boobs aren't quite as sore.

My OB has put me on progesterone supplements due to previous m/c, and my LPD. I started those today. I won't even go into the issues I had with that. (well, maybe later).

I still can't believe it!! I'm so excited I could burst!!! I have been wanting this for so long.
26 months of ttc
20 months of charting
numerous dr appts
a Lap and HSG 3 months vitamin B6 numerous months of drinking green tea preseed OPK's
3 months of clomid
1 month clomid and progesterone
2 months of Vitex

Been a very long road. It all seems so surreal.

Please pray this baby sticks.

And go figure...it was a birthday conception, and a Valentine's baby!! I'm due on Valentine's Day! God's timing really is perfect!

Thanks to everyone who has stuck by me and supported me through this whole ordeal! I appreciate it!!!

Just to let you know....

I haven't forgotten about the blog!!! It's been a crazy week and I will update very soon...hopefully tonight. Just wanted to post a message so that you all don't think I've deserted my blog!!!

New posts to come very soon!! Keep checking back!

What do you speak?

I got this from Cindy. This was fun. The only problem I had was they didn't have my choice for what you drink out of. We don't use water fountains or drinking fountians here. It's a bubbler. But I guess then it would say I'm 100% Milwaukean!

Your Linguistic Profile::

70% General American English

20% Upper Midwestern

5% Yankee

0% Dixie

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Song of the Day

Song of the day today is Hysteria by Def Leppard. One of my favorites.

It reminds me of my high school days. I'm not sure why exactly (or I don't really remember) but it always reminds me of my fantasy love back in the day. My fantasy love is a guy I liked in high school but it was a one way thing. We were friends, shared a kiss or two, but remained "just friends".

The song itself is a beautiful song. Very well written and the music in incredible. :) And well, it's Def Leppard so it's cool.

That's my review for the day :)

Flashback Friday

Here is a picture of Ryan when he was first born. This was taken when he was about 3 days old. If you notice, even the yellow knit hat that they give you at the hospital was too big on him. To this day he still sleeps like this. It's hard to believe he was once that small. He is wrapped in probably too many blankets (LOL) and is in a wedge that we purchased to allow him to sleep on his side. I'm not quite sure why we needed that, but I was told that he should sleep on his side. His crib and room was done in Baby Snoopy. His current room still is too. :)

Writers Wednesday 5/31/06

Here is another Dynasty 2 scene. I figure I'm on a roll with these. Here is the cast used or talked about in this scene. It's a little rough, but you get the idea.

Keith Summers- owns and CEO of SC Johnson Wax, one of the main characters of the soap.
Becky Summers- Keith's ex-wife, now lives in Seattle, pregnant with Keith's best friend's baby.
Sarah Jordan Keith's current wife
Mandy Summers- Keith and Becky's teenage daughter, offering to give her heart (literally) to boyfriend Jesse.
Jesse- Mandy's boyfriend, needs a heart transplant
Bryon Summers- Mandy's baby boy
Miranda Summers- Keith and Sarah's baby girl

The hospital. Jesse is in one room, Mandy in another, Keith, Becky, and Bryon in a waiting room. The doctors are just about ready to perform the heart transplant from Mandy to Jesse when....two doctors pushing a man on a stretcher burst through the hospital door.

Doctor 1: Out of the way! Emegency!
Doctor 2: What happened?
Doctor 1: Fatal explosion at the construction site. A huge boulder fell on him. He's bleeding internally.
Doctor 2: Let's get him in ER stat!
They quickly wheel the stretcher through another door.
Becky: I hate hospitals.
Keith: you'll be here soon you know.
Becky: well, in a different part of the hospital. A more cheerful part.
Keith: Becky, are you sure you won't reconsider my offer and move in? I've got that whole house to myself.
Becky: It's not exactly to yourself. You've got Miranda, Bryon, and about a million servants. And besides, I don't think Sarah would appreciate that idea too much.
Keith: Sarah will deal with it. What do you say?
Becky: I'm sorry Keith but I....
the doctor comes out of ER.
Becky: Doctor! What's happening? Is everything alright?
Keith: Is our daughter alive?

TTC vent (again)

I could just scream!! AUGH!!

Have I mentioned before how much I hate my cycle? Because I do.

I made the effort this month to have "perfect" timing.....I actually O'd on a weekend (finally!!) and Dh was actually willing (most likely because I didn't tell him I was Oing...works better when he thinks I actually want to do it). So we had perfect timing...actually got a high reading on FF....one of the few months that happens.

So what happens now?

I'm only 4 DPO and I have spotting....ALREADY!!!! WTH???

I'm also irritable, tired, have slight cramping, and my bbs are sensitve. Mind you...it may sound like positive things....like *air quote* "good signs", but it's not. I feel this way most of the time before af arrives. Lovely PMS. I could just scream or throw something...or both!!

I just don't get it. How did my body get so....broken?? I'm just so frustrated with all this.

I think I may call my OB next week and ask if I can go on clomid again....just clomid. I can't afford to do the progesterone test and pro. supplement, but if it's just clomid I can since that isn't too bad...and I've got birthday money to use.

Making a baby is NOT supposed to be this friggin hard.

My birthday party

I had a small party to celebrate mine and Bob's birthdays this past Sat. It was a lot of work but turned out well. It was a beautiful day out so we spent the majority of the day outside. Some of us played cards and Uncle Darrell kept Ryan busy! Bob grilled burgers and brats and we had tons of sides, of course, the cake! I didn't receive anything from my birthday wish list, but still received some nice things anyway. Bob and I were exhausted by the end of the day!

Uncle Darrell and Ryan



My mom, dad, brother Don, and I playing Texas Hold'em poker. I ended up winning!



Me getting ready to open cards and gifts.



My mom, dad, and best friend Julie.



Last but not least, the ice cream cake!

Finished product

The flowers after they have been planted, watered, and put in their spots.
These are on the deck in a sunny spot.



These are on the front of the deck between the deck furniture and the grill.



These are my hanging plants on the deck against the house.



These are in the front yard by the door.



These are in the front yard by the sidewalk.



I have more but didn't take pictures of all of them.

Flowers planted

I finally got my flowers planted on Friday. It was a beautiful day so I thought I'd take the opportunity to get it done. These are the flowers I purchased from K-Mart. They didn't have as good of a selection this year as they normally do, but they are cheap!



Ryan of course was helping me. First he started with a cup to scoop out the dirt.



Then he decided to get "down and dirty" and just use his hands.



He was adament about watering the flowers.



We had lots of fun planting the flowers, and still asks me to go to the store to buy more.

It's my Birthday!

It's here. It's my birthday today. :D

I'm excited (I always love my birthday) yet I'm also sad. I just realized another year of my fertility is gone. Another year yet again I'm not pregnant.

So you may ask, what am I doing on my wonderful birthday? What type of exciting and fun things do I have going on? Absolutely NOTHING. I'm doing laundry (oh what fun) and cleaning (oh even more fun). I need to get the house in order for the party tomorrow. Tell me again why I decided to have everyone over the day after my birthday? What was I thinking? Oh yeah, I was thinking of how badly I want that ice cream cake that my mother refused to buy me. At least I get to stuff myself full of comfort food.

And of course, my darling dh, forgets it's my birthday. This morning he is just about to go running out the door to go to work and I had to remind him. His response: "oh yeah, it IS your birthday isn't it?" augh. I told him he better stop somewhere on the way home from work to get something.

At any rate, it's another year, another day. But it's MY special day darn it! I need to find something fun to do today.

Happy 31st Birthday to Me! :D

Writers Wednesday 5/24/06

Many years ago my best friend from childhood and I made up a soap opera. We spent 3 years of our lives immersed in these characters, stories, plots, and lives. It was so much a part of my life that I knew the characters extremely well, like they were my family. I felt what the characters were feeling, I felt their pain and heartache, their passions and joys, their sorrows and grief. Though we may not have done this soap for many years now, it's still a part of my life as I think about it when I hear certain names, or certain songs.
The soap was called Dynasty 2 (after her favorite soap at the time). I wrote many many things for it, but I will share just a bit here (for today anyway).

The characters involved in this scene probably require some background.

Jeffrey Jordan- 44, lead singer in a rock band. The patriarch of the main family.
Mary Jordan- 40, Jeffrey's wife, housewife.
Candy Jordan (not shown but mentioned in scene)- 20, deceased. She was Mary and Jeffrey's daughter, was killed by a drunk driver a year ago.
Brad (can't remember his last name)- 20, Candy's boyfriend. Now currently living with Jeffrey and Mary.
Trisha- 5, Candy and Brad's daughter. When Candy died Brad assumed responsibility for her and was given custody of her on the grounds that he live with Jeffrey and Mary.

Dec 6, 1991- Friday Morning 7:30am

Scene 1: Jeffrey’s house. Living room. Jeffrey is listening to headphones and dancing around crazily. Mary is reading the newspaper. Trisha is watching cartoons while getting her school books together. Brad enters from the kitchen.

Brad: Trisha! Breakfast is ready.
Trisha: Yay!! I’m hungry!
Brad: Good. I made one of your favorites today. Strawberry waffles.
Trisha: Yummy!
Trisha runs out of the living room to the kitchen.
Brad: Walk!
Mary: You know, you don’t have to make breakfast every morning.
Brad: Well, I want her to start off her day with a nutricious breakfast. It’s the most important meal of the day.
Mary: I can’t believe how much you have grown up since…..
Brad: You can say it. You were going to say since Candy died, weren’t you? It’s ok. I’m moving on.
Jeffrey: (singing) Sad but true…..(still dancing around).
Mary: It’s just that you guys were so close.
Brad: yeah, we were. Can we please change the topic?
Mary: I’m just glad the judge agreed to give you custody of Trisha so long as you live with us.
Brad: Well, I would never leave Trisha to anybody. That girl is my world.
Trisha comes running to the living room.
Trisha: I’m ready for school Brad!
Brad: Did you brush your teeth already?
Trisha: yes
Brad: ok. Say good bye and we are off.
Trisha (to Mary): Bye grandma! (gives her a hug)
Mary: good bye darling. Have fun in school.
Trisha walks up to Jeffrey and taps him on the leg. He sees her and takes off his headphones.
Jeffrey: Off to school already kiddo? (picks her up) One of these days I’ll have to teach you how to play hooky.
Mary: Jeffrey!!
Jeffrey: hey! Just kidding! When you’re about 8 or 9.
Brad: You trying to teach her to grow up a hellraiser?
Jeffrey: Hey! All my kids were hellraisers! It’s a Jordan tradition!
Mary rolls her eyes. Jeffrey puts Trisha down.
Trisha: What’s a hellraiser?
Brad: come on Trish. Let’s go to school.
Trisha: all right.
She grabs her backpack and they walk out the door.
Jeffrey: Hey you. Come here.
Mary walks over to him and they embrace.
Jeffrey: I’m hungry.
Mary: Why didn’t you say so before? I could’ve…..
Jeffrey: Not for food.
Mary: mmmmm. Sounds interesting.
Jeffrey: Very.
They kiss and move toward the couch.

Soul Patrol baby!!

I'm so happy......Taylor won American Idol!! woo hoo!! Soul Patrol baby!

I actually wanted Chris to win...but since he was voted off a few weeks ago, I had to go with Taylor! And I'm so glad he won!
It was an interesting show this evening....even had a performance by Clay Aiken! Boy does he ever look different.

Can't wait to see what Taylor will be doing now (after the mandatory tour of course)!

Go Taylor Go!

Writers Wednesday 5/24/06

Ok...I will be sharing something....I just don't have time to write it out tonight. Look for a future post for today's writers wed!!